Something I've learned since I finished radiation therapy is that once you have cancer, it's figuratively 'always there'. I supposedly had a CPR ie complete pathological response, which means that my last petscan (somewhere around May), showed no cancer.
But how do I know that it won't come back?, isn't back already?, how long do I have without it? There seems to be more of a burden to deal with now than while I was having treatment. Then, I was doing something. I had a whole team of specialists encouraging me. Now, it's me and my mind. Quite alone.
And that's another biggie to deal with. After months of continuous company, support and interest in my well-being, now, people assume that I need to get on with my life. Well, I do. But I don't have all the confidence in the world at all times. In some ways, it's really tough putting your life back after it's over. On the other hand, there is so much to do. So much to enjoy. I am living the cliche of life being so short, make the most of every minute.
Never over. I know what you mean. I watch my daughter still like a hawk and it is almost five years already. I watch for your emails too - and always enjoy them! You are indeed a trooper!
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